i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
