You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
