I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
