if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
