I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
is wine microwaveable?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
