dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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