Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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