No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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