Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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