Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
