honey bunches of taint.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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