found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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