1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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