so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
