it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
