Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Randomize
