i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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