Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
