hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
