u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize