that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
