How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
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