: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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