Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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