So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I could fuck to npr.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
