everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
