How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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