I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
