I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Of course I have a pirate flag
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
