I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
