Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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