I'm lost and stupid without you.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize