I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
