About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
