Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
