someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize