Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
It's just like the Real World with babies
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
