one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
