I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Randomize
