at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
i need some magic done to my vagina
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
