porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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