More tranny stories later!
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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