why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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