Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
