I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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