Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
