do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
you win again, gameday.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize