why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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