Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
