This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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