While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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